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Free-IQTest.net - IQ Test Quote of the Day:

I'm still in Florida.
2003-06-21, 11:51 p.m.

WARNING!!!! If you know me personally, you may read my diary, but if you do, you take the chance of reading things you don't want to know, misunderstanding what I've written and being hurt by it. If you are unsure if it is okay to read, save yourself, and me, the grief and heartache, and ask first!!! Please note that this is a DIARY, I.E. my subjective feelings, hearsay, suppositions, and outpourings of ranting of the moment. It does not represent objective news, the whole of what I think of a topic or someone, or even a thought-out representation of any of the above. This I hope you keep in mind, and thank you for reading.

I'm in Florida right now.

On Papa's computer. He was nice enough to let me read some other's entries, and when I say "other's" I mean Vicky, because, THANK GOD for at least this, I only could remember her password. Shit, I feel fuckin bad as hell, but I'm having a bad day anyways.

I've had no privacy at all. I haven't read any of Vicky's letters, but hey, more for later, right?

PAPA, my good buddy papa, one of the people I have been closest to in my whole fucking life looked at me today like I was a serial killer.

I couldn't understand! I seriously started crying in front of my mom but without her asking me why. I couldn't talk anyways. I was crying like a baby like I always do, and I had no idea why the fuck I was anyways. I am crying right now, even, dammit. Papa will probably come down any moment and talk to me.

Oh well, the DRIVE down here was AWESOME. I was almost killed by this spanish mother fucker in a McDonald's bathroom. He just gave me this weird look, "Your penis is bigger than mine, friend."

Just kidding. He didn't say that, though he was shorter than me. I read his fuckin mind. He stood there, and waited for me to walk past him after I was finished. He scared me, I was scared.

Then I went to get a drink, some red pop, and the thingy got stuck, so I flooded that part. If you don't believe any of this sounds-far-fetched shit, ask my mom. She thought it was hilarious. I waisted most of their red pop. That was the only eventful thing that happened, until we got to the state of Florida, and it was raining. Raining so hard, that this red truck slid and flipped over, and you will believe that because I have the result of the crash on tape. ON FILM. On my nifty digital video camera. The red truck flipped on its side crashing into a fence. Pretty sweet, nobody was hurt, so its all gooood.

Papa looked at me like a serial killer though. My dad is trying to ruin me, he is saying "Oh, Christopher hasn't been in any sports and has been a lazy no good kid to me all year."

Maybe my grades weren't good enough, but I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH for my dad. My dad expects the best of the best out of me, and really puts it in my face if I make ONE little damn screw up. "[The Fat One] has done very well, she's been in sports AND kept up her grades."

Then Papa looks at me like shit. He says he's pleased with the Fat One and then I'm dog shit. I'm nothing. We're over. On the cruise, I'll talk to him. We're leaving tomorrow around 2:00pm, and that starts out with a manditory life boat test. That's gonna be fun.

Mom took a trip to Wal Mart and got me shoes, a really bitchin' shirt, and "the wildest swimming suit she could find." Its pretty cool. My mom is being too nice to me. Everyone is being to nice to me, so I guess PAPA is giving me just what I deserve. I feel better now, thanks to my mom.

Damn, its been one day, and I miss Victoria so badly that it hurts. My God, at the dinner table I ate a lot, thinking of her, but at the same time my eyes hurt like hell. I can't cry at the dinner table. Seeing Papa's face killed me.

Quote of the Day, said in my first letter from my most perfect girlfriend:

"Our love is rare."

I'm thinking of her always. This trip was gonna be fun with Papa, and Nona is getting the most of my attention. She asked me about school. She is also very supportive of me becoming a movie director. She knows I have the skill, and the mind to get me there, and have that kind of a life.

Papa said he had a lot of work, er, he's "been busy." I asked him, "Good busy, like you've been up to something all the time, or stressful busy?"

"Stressful busy, but I like it, its fun."

I don't know what his problem is. Since I'm dumb, I'm not good enough for him either. I suck. That's where my dad got it from. My dad's getting me back. This trip, I'm working on the family video and that's all I care about.

I'm thinking about it this way, being with Vicky is my vacation. This cruise isn't the vacation part. I don't know if I can have fun without her. It's definitly not as fun, and so it just seems like it sucks. I'm sure it'll get better.

I still miss Chelsey also. I'd be happy if just Chelsey was down here. My family is boring, we had a weird silence, GOD DAMN it, that's the only reason I'm here, is to break the weird silences, and then I'm silent the rest of the time anyways. Shit.

I'm nothing, I wanna go home.

I'm in love with Victoria.

I'm gonna go look at her picture that she gave me, I wasn't able to the whole trip. Our trip was 23 hours long. I have a little footage on tape, including an upside down red truck. I am not on tape yet. Only my voice is there, and I'm not worried that that's not enough.

I haven't seen Vicky in technically over a day. This is different because it hasn't been this way for weeks.

I miss Victoria. I miss Chelsey. I miss Doug. I even miss McB a little bit, but he's in Florida with me. I don't know where, he's going home on Sunday. Maybe today, I don't know.

I gotta get off, and go model my new clothes for Nona. She always says I look "sharp." Haha, Nona is so nice.

Tomorrow I'm going on my cruise, so I'll be away from any computer for at least four days. This will also be different for me. Being away from Vicky one day sucks, but I have her letters. I have her picture and even her smell, I have at least some smell from her first letter. That smell that made me obsessed.

Love can make you crazy. I'm sure that's been said before.

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