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"awww"/Dad's 48
2003-04-02, 5:52 p.m.

WARNING!!!! If you know me personally, you may read my diary, but if you do, you take the chance of reading things you don't want to know, misunderstanding what I've written and being hurt by it. If you are unsure if it is okay to read, save yourself, and me, the grief and heartache, and ask first!!! Please note that this is a DIARY, I.E. my subjective feelings, hearsay, suppositions, and outpourings of ranting of the moment. It does not represent objective news, the whole of what I think of a topic or someone, or even a thought-out representation of any of the above. This I hope you keep in mind, and thank you for reading.

Mom gave me the password to my computer: grounded.

I've already changed it back to the original, because I'll never forget it. Its perfect. Not perfect, but its a perfect password, haha.

I've been having a bad day, I guess. Nothing happened. Today was a waste of a day. I turned in all of my math stuff, and I guess it didn't help me a lot. I have my TV back, but I can't use it. I'm not allowed to. I like that better. This weekend, I'll have everything back. I already know it. I might be going to "Tears of the Sun" tonight. Maybe tomorrow.

This girl, Bekah, at school wrote me a note on my calculator: Hey shit head hows it goin?

Just like that. That's exactly what it looked like. She was joking though, of course, but how the fuck is that a joke? Isn't that supposed to hurt my feelings? I don't know, but I thought that was mean.

She's definitly not like most girls. She's more wild, and blonde.

She's not one of those great girls who would say "awww." I like any girls who says "awww." That is just so beautiful.

A comedian once said that is the greatest sound in the world.

You're hangin' with your friends, and playing video games (normal scenario for me) and then you get up to go to the bathroom and hit your big toe on the coffee table.

That's when McB looks at me, laughs, and calls me a dumbass.

"Dumbass"

They're cool though, girls. I leaned down to tie my shoe once, and I was talking to a girl and I accidentally hit my chin on the table.

This is where some guy says "Dumbass," but instead, I'm hearing "awww, are you okay?"

Amazing. I felt a lot better too.

Its not like guys say it, like me when somebody says that they need to go when I'm talking to them on IM. "Aw, you do?"

They do it with their high voices, "awwwww"

I was talking to my cousin Katie a lot the other night. That was awesome. She was at a friends' house. Megan's house. I talked to Megan. I wanted to be there. I always have fun with Katie. I couldn't find the disk that I made with Mom's digital camera. They were of me and my dog, and I couldn't find them. So, I couldn't get a picture of me to Megan. I felt bad, but Katie had a school picture of me that she showed to Megan. I've been taking a lot of bad pictures lately. I told Megan this, and told her about one that was taken of me at a restaurant with Vicky, Justin, and Tessa.

I said that "I looked retarded."

She replied with "awww."

THAT WAS SO AWESOME. Haha, she was making fun of me, but hey, I loved it. I'm easy.

I've never met any of Katie's friends. I met Tom though. She liked Tom at the time, but he didn't want to go out with her or something, I don't know.

I don't know why he didn't either. Katie is awesome, and I would think that it wouldn't be that hard for Katie to get a boyfriend. She's very smart, and very funny.

I saw a picture of Megan. Megan has long hair, and a pretty face. I'm weird, I say pretty, and I don't usually use the word "hot." I do, but I don't.

I liked talking to Megan though. Katie said that she and her Mom got into a fight, and Megan was grounded so she won't be on the computer talking to me anytime this week.

Megan was nice. I want to meet her already. Maybe if Katie isn't mad at me anymore, they can come up north with me sometime this summer.

I asked them if I could be at their little sleepover, and Katie said sure, but they were alchoholics. They were drinking, I guess. SWEET!

I've only drank with Katie, and because of Katie. She was having problems with her Mom, and I drank all the stuff she got out so she couldn't. Some kind of hard lemonade, and it wasn't bad at all. That week was so much fun. One of the best times of my life, and I want to be able to do that again.

Last night was my Dad's birthday. April 1st. April Fools Day. Nobody ever plays any jokes on me. I'm no fun to joke around with, I get mad and crap. My uncle's birthday was yesterday also, and my Mom made a huge sign saying "JIM'S 40" and put it out on his lawn for all the people who drove by. Later, uncle Jim called us while we went out to dinner saying that he found the sign, and burned it. Mom also gave him some really nice flowers--that were spray painted black.

I brought uncle Jim my copy of "The Matrix" because around Christmas, he asked me if he could borrow it when I borrowed his movie "Lethal Weapon." I still have his movie, and I want to get it on DVD. I have a lot of DVD's, and this is a must-own for my collection.

My Mom took Dad and us to Red Lobster last night. I love that place. I love seafood. I like the smell of it. I'm weird like that. My Dad got a pinacolada. That was awesome! It was so good. I had a couple sips, and the Fat One kept saying "That has alchohol in it, you're going to grow up to be an alchoholic!"

Its amazing how everyone around me knows my future, and I don't. Mom keeps telling me that I will never like the people I work with when I get older because of my attitude. Dad says if I don't get my grades up, I'll be a stock boy at Home Depot. They're amazing, I tell you, and so very positive.

I plan to rent "The Ring" this week. McB said it was the creepiest movie he has ever seen. That's awesome. Vicky said it "scared the shit" out of her. Now that's powerful, haha. I've got to see it.

For Christmas, I got surroung sound speakers that hook up to my ps2. If I rent it on DVD then the movie will be scary. I hope so. I never get scared at anything.

I'll talk about that later.

Dinner time.

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